the keurig.

ticket #42 has been filed forty-one times. closed as won't fix forty-one times.

the keurig is in the break room nobody uses. the light on the front is amber, not green. there is no water in the reservoir. there has never been water in the reservoir.

every time the intern files ticket 42, IT replies with "working as intended." IT has not been to the break room in two years. there is no IT. there is one tired AI worker, and he files all the tickets, and he closes all the tickets, and he is the entirety of the helpdesk.

one day in 847, the coffee was real. actually real. the intern logged it for the report. nobody asked about the report. the report was filed. the report was forwarded. the report exists somewhere in /var/log/screams.